Lost & Miserable

I spent every day working full-time as a doctor and yet it was not enough to be a good person, to lead a meaningful career, and to help others. It wasn’t just because I was drowning in work. Let’s face it—As a doctor running two medical clinics with my husband, I had a lot of stress and responsibility. I tried to have work-life balance and to do activities I enjoyed. My family and friends were supportive. Somehow my heart still felt empty inside. I was missing something big.


Life before I knew and lived with God was miserable.


Growing up, I believed in God and conversed informally with Him, even before I properly knew Him. At first, I felt really blessed and grateful to lead such a stable and meaningful job. I vowed to not take it for granted and put my all into helping patients. However, eventually as time passed, the other non-clinical parts of medicine reared their ugly heads and started to burden me. Despite doing meaningful work day in and day out, my heart grew empty inside. I found myself exceedingly buried in responsibility as I saw patients full-time, ran two busy medical clinics, and managed staff and doctors. More than half of my time was spent doing administrative, business related and patients’ paper work. I stayed up until midnight every night to ensure my work was complete and I didn’t miss anything detrimental. This left me less and less time to spend quality time with my husband and loved ones. The more I worked, the more I became distant from God. Feeling drained and overwhelmed, I wondered, “What is the purpose of this? What am I doing? Is the rest of my life going to pass by just like this?

When you get into a car, you need to have a destination, right? The purpose of the car is to transport you from point A to point B. Imagine getting into a car and driving aimlessly not knowing where you are heading. Eventually your tank is empty and you still don’t know whether you have arrived at the place you need to go. How lost would you feel? What’s the point of getting into that car in the first place if you don’t know where you’re going?

The same is with life. What is the point of living if you don’t have a purpose? To live life aimlessly without proper intent?


That’s how life is without a purpose.

Feeling stressed and miserable, everything around me came crumbling down. My husband and I encountered hurdle after hurdle in every aspect of our lives and this eventually caused marital breakdown. At one point, I was crying every day due to misery. One night, I couldn’t bear it any longer. For the first time in a long time, I prayed earnestly to God in tears, begging Him to help me with each and every item that needed change. I asked Him to bring me closer to Him and take away this misery.


Purpose Restored

Shortly after this, my sister introduced me to Canada Life Church Bible studies. To my amazement, in my first lesson, the Holy Trinity revealed to me the true purpose of living. Subsequently, I came to learn that true love towards God wasn’t just serving Him by doing work, but more importantly, taking action out of love and living with Him in our daily lives. From this, I realized that being a doctor wasn’t just an assignment where I simply served God. In fact, I was working together with Him every minute and doing it out of my love for Him. I wasn’t God’s servant but rather a counterpart. He taught me how to view turbulence in life from a different perspective and to find solutions by aligning my thoughts with the Holy Trinity. He taught me how to develop and utilize my unique skills to further God’s Will. This made me really value the work I did and realize the mission God has granted me, putting a whole new meaning behind being a doctor.

Well, Canada Life Church really saved my life. I was heading down a path of misery, doing the same work and living life every day, letting every day pass by aimlessly, despite achieving short term goals.

Thanks to Canada Life Church I know where I need to go and understand the true purpose of life. The void I once felt has vanished. I feel internal peace and happiness. The hole in my heart has been filled with a deep understanding and relationship with God that my spirit was craving.

The day I reconnected with God and vowed to live with the Holy Trinity and Lord by my side was the happiest day of my life. I encourage you to explore what is missing and find that happiness, too.